My partner on Metamorphosis Event Christian's family run the Kipriaki's restaurant in Whistler, and one day his mom asked him to go buy some potatos, so he went to Squamish to buy potatoes.  The girl at the farm selling 100 lb potatoes had a litter of about 20 kittens that she insisted to give away with the potatoes.  Being allergic to cats, but attracted to kittens, Christian was tore, but he decided to take two kittens back with him, and named them Tatter and Tots. 

Since I've been spending a lot of time together working on Metamorphosis with Christian, going over logistical planning, entertainment, catering etc... I've have grown to really like Tatter.  He's very gentle, and love to cuddle up to you.  He's also very playful and meows for attention like children.  I always thought I was a dog's person, but Tatter is changing my mind.

Just to show you how cute and funny this cat is, because he does not eat regular cat food that contains meat, or seafood, etc.  He only eats specialty cat food that comes from naturalpathic stores.  Here is Christian feeding him catelope, Yummy!

It was a Friday night that I was suppose to get together with my best girlfriends, it didn’t happen, so I went to see the BC Lion’s Game, learned it was full of hicks who scream on top of their lungs, so I left at mid-game and walked over to Chapters.  I felt the need to get some knowledge about relationships, so bought 3 books: “How to make a man fall in love with you” by Stacy Cabot, “How to get a date worth keeping” by Dr. Henry Cloud, and “O’s Guide to Life, The Best of O, The Oprah Magazine”

I was having a good time giving myself a facial scrub, mud mask, and reading these books, and laughing out loud from Stacy’s 10 Classic Bastard Types.
1.    The Achiever: The Achiever is a universal man married to a higher cause, dedicated to something larger than he is, like medicine, or humanity.  The Achiever is an admirable member of society but a lousy partner in a relationship.  He pays little attention to you and is often too tired to do anything but sleep when he takes time off.  Your love for each other is a grain of sand compared to the global grandeur of his more time-consuming passion, but he does have some advantages.  He is dependable – for some things.  He always knows what time it is, he makes dates well in advance, and if he can’t show, he’ll either call or be reasonably apologetic.  But forget about leisurely time spent just being together.  He doesn’t have any.  He always falls asleep immediately after making love, if he doesn’t fall asleep without making love.  Don’t worry about making breakfast in the morning, because he’s already gone.  It’s easy to get sucked in by an Achiever.  On the surface, he’s suck a good citizen, so attractive, successful, hard working, affluent, even intelligent.  He’s the man your mother always dreamed you’d marry.  It’s impossible not to think of marriage with him, because the Achiever offers financial security and obviously needs a wife.  Then he could devote more time to his coma patients or to his study of prehistoric reptiles.  Without having to worry about details like cooking or cleaning house, he could save precious seconds.  Actually, a robot would do if she looked good.  He needs someone to sit quietly at awards dinners.  If you try to get him away from his work, he will only make you feel tacky and small.  Your world consciousness will be suspect and he’ll most likely suggest volunteer work of some kind.  If all this upsets you, don’t complain to your mother or your friends; they’ll agree with him.  The Achiever is universally admired, but when it comes to returning love, he’s a bastard.  If you don’t want to spend your life as a lonely Stepford wife, don’t even start to get involved with this guy.
2.    The Guru:  The Guru always has a cause.  Ofthen, he’s been married and didn’t like it, so his higher consciousness tells him that the two of you are above such mundane concerns.  He’s also a nonbeliever about making money, ironing clothes, eating meals, drinking coffee, high-heeled shoes, makeup, hair coloring, television, psychiatry, organized religion, sports, or anything else that has kept you sane over the years.  Naturally you’re suspicious when you first meet a man whth a fantastic glow in his eyes, and a deep concern for your “psychic energy,” but there’s something charming and disarming about his open easy ways.  He knows your inner soul.  He exudes love.  His eye contact is instant and astonishing.  Your eyes meet, and his seem to penetrate your innermost secrets.  I was always amazed at how quickly I could be seduced by a Guru.  It was the way he cared about my inner void.  He was full of ideas to fill it.  The Guru is often a leader with lots of followers who all do exactly what he says.  To ensure his continued exalted position you must become one of his followers too, worshipping at the shrine of his latest cause and heeding his every instruction.  He may be involved in est, TM, a new business scheme or multi-level sales.  Whatever it is, he expects you to devote your time and assets to his newest cause.  There will be lots of people around to hang on to his every word.  You will be expected to adore him as they do, to do his bidding instantly and to entertain and feed, even to love, his followers as much as you do him.  The Guru is a terrific lover because he thinks he’s God doing “it” in his own special way to a disciple, you.  He wants to make sure you never forget his greatness.  Once you are fully indoctrinated, agreeing to turn your home and possessions over to him and his entourage and to devote your life to his cause, he really starts dancing on your devotion.  “Why do you always follow me around that way?”  he wants to know.  The best way to get rid of him is to refuse to let him have meetings at your house.
3.    The Timebomb:  The Timebomb is your classic unstable personality hidden beneath a normal veneer.  Timebombds come in several varieties-latent alcoholics, compulsive gamblers, obsessive Don Juans, drug abusers, physical abusers, and just plain crazies.  If you could see the inner person, you wouldn’t go near him.  The problem is that the Timebomb is attractive and charming on the surface, and it’s hard to hear the Timebomb ticking…  He’s so nice in the beginning that you tent to get hooked.  Then, just as you begin to feel certain that true love has at last felled you and someone else at the same time, an explosion invariably rocks your security with a Timebomb.  And of course the first time it happens you don’t recognize it as a pattern.  Afterwards, he swears he is reformed; he’ll never binge, gamble, cheat, O.D., hit you, or go crazy again…. If he’s got you hooked, you keep loving him, you forgive him, and soon the two of you are together again.  But the signs were there all along.  His ex-wife doesn’t speak to him, his former live-in girlfriend is in an institution for the mentally disturbed, and a jealous male or female is always trying to get him.   He hates his job as a salesman and always wanted to be an actor.  He even took lessons once.  If you listen closely, he’ll give you clues.  A Timebomb seems to enjoy telling about his perilous personal life: how his ex-wife tried to run him over with her car, how some guy tried to shoot him for dating his girl.  The Timebomb doesn’t just get mad when you argue.  He breaks your jaw.  He doesn’t just fall in love with another woman.  He falls in love with your best friend when you’re seven months pregnant.  He doesn’t just lose his job, he gets fired for embezzling money and expects you to stand by him during the trial.  He doesn’t just blow money at the track, he loses your life savings.  Staying with a Timebomb is life flying in an airplane when the pilot’s number is up.  The temptation is to hang around and wait for your beautiful romance to bloom once more can be seductive, but you’d be better off trading parachutes while sky diving.  The Timebomb is seriously disturbed, almost always self-destructive, and sometimes very dangerous.  If you’ve got a Timebomb in your life, accept that his life pattern is unchangeable.  If you don’t get away, it’ll be yours too.  Divide up your mutual possessions and separate your bank accounts first.  Then change the locks on your door and your phone number.  Never accept collect calls from jail.
4.    The Waffler:  The Waffler won’t make a decision.  He’s not sure of anything, including whether he wants you.  One reason he can’t decide is because he’s greedy.  He really wants everything.  He’s afrid he’s missing something with someone else each minute he’s with you.  A Waffler never makes a date ahead of time for anything because he’s afraid something better might come along at the last minute, and then he’s be committed to you and unhappy all night thinking about what he might have missed.  He breaks dates often, especially after the initial glow of a relationship is fading.  You always know it’s because he thinks he might get something better.  He never stops looking, even after he’s been married for years.  There’s no real fun in a relationship with a Waffler because he’s never satisfied with anything.  He can’t enjoy the here and now, because he’s always imagining a prettier face, bigger tits, a taller, longer legged version of you somewhere.  No real woman ever lives up to the fantasy one in his mind.  A Waffler can change his philosophy of life in an hour; he considers changing careers, homes, selling out and moving away.  Nothing he already has is ever any good for very long.  He thinks that more or different or new acquisitions will make him happy.  What he really needs is about two years of intensive professional help, not you.
5.    The Supervisor:  The Supervisor is a natural critic and speaks only from his own perfection.  He rarely works, preferring to tell other people what to do.  When you meet him, he immediately gives you all his credits, and lets you know you’re very lucky he’s chosen you.  Naturally, you’re impressed by his good taste.  It’s obvious from the way he criticizes everyone else that you’re the perfect two.  If it isn’t obvious, he tells you.  He knows how you should dress, put your makeup on, even brush your teeth, and as long as you agree, he’s happy.  He knows what will make you happy too!  He will direct your career, tell you how to talk to your mother, even what you want in lovemaking.  He knows without a doubt that what you really need the most is him.  There’s always a moment when things start to go sour in a relationship with a Supervisor: when he discovers you don’t dust the tops of doors.  The first chink in your perfection is his opening.  From there he splits your self-confidence apart, leaving your ego in little pieces.  Suddenly you can’t do simple things you always did almost automatically.  If you make coffee, the pot burns up.  If it’s a roast, it’s still frozen on the inside.  There’s no way you can do anything right.  It’s all down from there.  Soon the slightest infraction of the Supervisor’s rules of conduct turns him into a raging beast and you into a tear-dripping mess.  Strong defiance is the best way to get rid of a Supervisor.  Wear the red dress he hates.  Don’t tell your best friend you can’t talk on the phone when he’s there.  Make plans with friends he doesn’t like.
6.    The Carpetbagger:  The Carpetbagger is easy to spot because he arrived at your house and just stays.  He doesn’t have to call home because he doesn’t have one.  He always has enough clothes with him to last at least a month.  His dog is in the car and so are most of his belongings.  He is always broke and hungry when he gets to your house and will stay as long as you feed him and give him lots of love.  He’s attractive and sweet and helpful around the house and a wonderful lover.  He has a way of just fitting in.  But he never takes you anywhere.  He’s either about to make a fortune or has just lost one.  He expects to be nurtured between fortunes.  No matter how much you give the Carpetbager, he doesn’t give anything back, except playing the guitar and making love.  When you think he’s gotten everything you have to offer, eaten all the food in the house, finished the wine, exhausted you, he’ll say, “I have a load of dirty clothes in the truck of my car.  Is it okay if I just put them in your machine?”  Then he needs dogfood for his Great Dane, stationary to write his mother, a stamp of course, and do you have a sweater big enough for him to borrow?  In the beginning the Carpetbagger can be tender and delicate with his lovemaking, almost worshipful, a wellspring of foreplay.  But when he finishes with lovemaking he usually finds something urgent he must do, leaving you with the foretaste of his ultimate splitting.  When he’s around, he’s romantic and attentive, and you miss both when he’s gone, but he’s really a bad bet for a long term relationship.  You can get rid of the Carpetbagger easily enough by either cutting off his support system or asking for a month’s contribution to food and rent in advance.  It’s always sad when he’s gone, though, because he’s been around all the time.  Without him, your house feels empty, as though your favourite guppy passed away.
7.    The Dealer:  The Dealer’s real ambition in life is to be invited to join the Corlone family.  He has a suicidal fascination with ill-gotten fains and a phobia about honest work.  He’s not hard to spot, but he has that “Ladies Love Outlaws” kind of appeal.  Somehow he makes you yearn to be taken into his confidence.  Besides, you’re naturally curious.  You can’t wait to know all about his shady friends.  It’s clear that when he admits his criminal dealings to you, you should be flattered.  You’ve earned his sacred trust.  The next step after trust in involvement.  He even offers you a profit.  All you have to do is let him leave three-hundred pounds of marijuana in your attic for a couple of weeks.  Or go on a stolen credit card shopping spree with him.  You’re perfectly safe, he insists.  Even if you don’t get arrested, you soon find that your nerves aren’t holding you together the way they used to-before you met the Dealer.  Maybe it was because he showed you all his scars and broken bones, or he brought a gun to your apartment, or you think your phone is being tapped by the CIA, but you’re taking three Valium a day and still shaking soon after your first date.  If you hang in – for the excitement, the sex, or whatever – it gets worse.  Soon he starts treating you like his moll.  You can whatever you own are now his possessions.  The easiest way to get rid of him is to admit you think the police are watching your house.
8.    The Patient:  The patient really wants you to take care of him.  His mother wasn’t very warm or loving and he is still looking for the woman who will make up for her inadequacies.  There is absolutely nothing he won’t do to exploit your motherly instincts.  Just your basic sympathy sponge.  Patients have been known to fake illness so well that they really make themselves sick.  You, Florence Nightingale, are supposed to stand by, even ready to hold his head at the crucial moment, pluck his ingrown toenail at just the perfect place or soothe his sunburn.  There’s no limit to the illnesses he can conjure up or inflict on himself.  You can guarantee the Patient will have an abominable toothache in the middle of your birthday party.  It seems as if you’re always rushing him to some emergency hospital or other.  Each new catastrophe requires a new, healthy diet, different vitamins, and the most sincere concern for the funnel functions of his body.  He is grateful for every bit of solicitude and wrings it out of you, sopping it up like mother’s milk.  You’re expected to interrupt anything should his fragile condition require attention.  And, of course, this includes sexual ministrations, so you give in every time.  Patients make so much noise when they have an orgasm you think they’re going to die.  Afterwards, instead of tender words whispered softly, from him you get deep rasping noises as he flings himself across the bed and clutches his chest.  You always pray he doesn’t die on top of you.  You can discourage the Patient by hiding all the medication in your house, even aspirin.  Tell him you’re a believer in faith healing and that if he wants to get well his mind will cure him.  Don’t refill the Band-Aids when he used up the last ones.  The next time you hear his agonized yell of pain, say you’ll be there when you finish meditating.  Complain of various lurid female problems that you think might be contagious.  Make him sick enough to check into a hospital by continually telling him how bad he looks.
9.    The Cripple:  The cripple is one of the walking wounded in our modern society.  Just divorced, he’s an emotional basket base.  He lives in a large singles’ complex with a “ready-renter’s” package of plastic plates, tin silverware, and Army surplus cups.  His finished studio apartment doesn’t have a book or personal picture in sight.  It’s devoid of healthy emotions, personality, or commitment-just like him.  The Cripple will probably get better, but it may take years.  It’s certain that you don’t want to be the first woman he gets involved with after his divorce.  He’s still bleeding and too involved with his own pain and losses to make a good mate for you.  He’s worried about his ex-wife, the guy she’s sleeping with, what her lawyer’s taking away from him, the house he already lost, the kids he doesn’t know if he’ll be able to keep seeing, and how he’s going to make those alimony and child support payments.  For sure, she took something personal of his that he wants back, maybe a whole slew of things.  He’s worried about his barbecue he had “before the marriage” twenty years ago, or the plaster monkey he won in a softball tournament, or his tool box that his ex is letting someone else use.  He wants his things back more than he wants a relationship with you or anyone else.  Sex with a Cripple is usually a disaster.  He can’t get it up.  Or if he does, he can’t keep it up,  Or if he keeps it up and actually manages to penetrate you, he can’t come.  Or if he comes, he feels guilty right afterwards.  The way to get rid of the Cripple is to refuse to listen to any more stories about his ex-wife, his divorce, what he lost, his kids, or his past.  Refuse to sympathize or help him get the barbecue back.  Tell him you think his ex was a very lovely person.
10.    The Fairy Godfather:  The Fairy Godfather is the one type of bastard who’s almost impossible to resist.  His pitch is that he’s not like all those other men who weren’t so nice.  He’s different, and he’s here to show you what real love is like.  “Just give me a chance,” he begs.  What ever your secret fantasy is, the Fairy Godfather ferrets it out.  He wants to make you happy, so he pretends to be whatever you always wanted.  He promises to make your dreams come true, even before he knows specifics.  He loves you, loves you, loves you!  He never takes his eyes or his hands off you.  Even if there’s something obviously wrong with the man, you pretend he’s okay because, after all, he does love you and that’s good for something.  In almost no time at all, he’s like a member of your family.  Your parents always ask how he is.  They too believe your Fairy Godfather is going to protect you from the world.  Lucky you.  Whatever your dreams-marriage, career, family, travel- Fairy Godfather is here to make them true.  He not only makes dates in advance, he has wonderful things scheduled for the rest of your life.  These fantasy promises the Fairy Godfather dangles in front of you are like a golden carrot, and like a tired racehorse you perk up at the bait.  Soon, the thought of losing him is inextricably tied to the thought of losing all your dreams, of never getting to do all the wonderful things he has planned for you.  You see houses, trips, true love, marriage, babies, floating away with his love, and so you battle to keep your affairs going.  It’s a losing flight.  The Fairy Godfather is a fantasy (partly yours) and his promises are worth less than the paper they’re written on.  You finally begin to notice that nothing you both talk about ever actually happens.  The best thing to do at that point is simply realize it’s over, stop looking at him with stardust in your eyes, and he’ll go away by himself.
I found the above described bastard types to be hilarious and thought you might get a kick out of it.  
Stacy goes on to describe that there are really three types of senses people perceive and communicate: Visual, Audio, and Feeling people.  So figure out what type your man, and speak in his language.  The book also gives helpful tips on negotiation skills, coaxing information out of a man, and train him to be the best lover in the world.  I found the book entertaining, but I can’t take it that seriously.  Some of the stuff she’s teaching are NLP technique, which I find very manipulative.